This has nothing to do with football.
It has to do with the fact that I am not a fan of March 17th ... not ever again. The leprechauns who promise luck and good fortune and rainbows and pots of gold are full of crap.
March of 1985, just scant months after Rick and I got married, saw St. Patrick's day come and with it a life threatening auto accident. Now, flash forward to March of 2013 and yet another life threatening accident.
I am trying to find some reason for this. I am also trying to find some kind of understanding of just how the Lord Almighty wants to use this experience to help me help someone else.
Either way, I'm beginning to think that I don't ever want to leave the house on this particular date again.
I'm thankful to my Father in Heaven for sparing my life.
I'm thankful for the blessings of the priesthood of God that continue to shore up my faith, strengthen my ability to endure and just comfort me through all of this particular trial.
I am thankful to be home with my family and to have another time to just tell them I love them. To kiss Jared's soft hand and hold it while I let him know that he is important to me. To tell Rick how much I love and appreciate him and his care for me.
I'm thankful for the long-distance prayers of Thomas and Tianna that bridge the distance and that lets me know that our family is eternal.
I'm grateful for the blessing of the prayers of friends and family near and far each and every day that strengthen me and help me feel like I can endure.
Luck is a misnomer. It's a worldly attribution that removes the hand of God.
The feeling I have now is BLESSED.
And I know that I am very richly blessed and preserved indeed.
God bless us all in our individual trials.
April 5, 2013
March 4, 2013
Roll Tide Responsibility
Young men make mistakes. So do old men. No one is immune to making a wrong choice. However, having said that, I also believe FIRMLY in the principle of accountability and consequence of choice. When you choose wisely, you are generally rewarded for the decision even if that reward is nothing more than a clean conscience and a clear mind unfettered by the worry of discovery.
When you choose poorly, and do so habitually, you open up a can of worms that just never seems to stop breeding. It's not that choosing poorly in and of itself is so horrible that you become unredeemable. It is that making certain choices reveal so much of your character and your decision making process that it becomes undeniable that you are untrustworthy and worse yet, that you are developing a streak within that sees nothing wrong with the victimization of other people for temporary personal gain.
That is dangerous.
The mind that thinks this way is a mind that has a serious problem with understanding the feelings, needs and desires of another human soul. It is the same kind of mind that assumes as long as no personal pain is experienced and that you are not "caught" that whatever act you committed isn't really a big deal and that is a tremendous problem that in short order becomes a societal one.
No organization, team or family can long tolerate the behavior of the few who do not feel that rules apply equally to all members. Their presence serves as the kind of disruptive factor that can destroy all that it comes in contact with and that wounds all whom it touches. The people who act as if the world is their oyster and everything they can touch or lay claim to should somehow be theirs with no thought of the labor of another are a burden to all.
The "infection", if you will, of this dangerous mindset can corrupt an entire group of people to the degree that they become drones on society and that is truly a heartbreak. Far better to sever out the few weak tendrils than to allow them to grow and breed and choke the life out of the tender plant that is personal accountability and character.
Many have criticized Nick Saban for not "acting immediately" to throw the 4 young men off the team for their robbery of a fellow UA student. He suspended them indefinitely pending investigation by the school and then, when the facts were all in place, they were dismissed - not just from the team, but from the campus, the school and the family that is the University of Alabama.
Saban did the right thing by allowing the university officials to conduct their investigation and to allow the honor code of the school to guide the way. A hasty rush to judgment wasn't warranted and serves no good purpose. The young men confessed so it was simply a matter of timing.
Our microwave society doesn't take too kindly to being told that decisions of this magnitude need to be more crockpot than microwave. By that, I mean that had the school acted presumptively and then discovered that some or all of the young men had been innocent in any degree, it would have created a trust problem between the students and the faculty that serves no one.
A crockpot mentality takes time to develop the idea into an act. Had these four young men been more deliberate in there thinking, perhaps they would have turned from their notion of destroying their own opportunity and that of abusing the trust of a UA family member in the process. I cannot guarantee they wouldn't have gone on ahead and acted rashly. But I can say that had at least some of them might have given their actions a second thought, the evening might well have turned out differently for all concerned.
Being responsible isn't "sexy". People view the "responsible one" as a wet blanket at a party, a real downer and someone who doesn't know how to live in the moment. But the truth is, our society does not function if everyone is a spontaneous "life of the party" functionary. We NEED the responsible persons to remind us all that while there are parties in life, life itself is NOT a party. There are times where we must deliberate carefully the cost of our actions on ourselves, our family and upon the larger world we must share with others.
Being responsible may well have saved the four students from their own stupidity and saved their victim the trauma caused by those whom he should have been able to trust always.
I do hope that this experience will serve to be an example to these four young men. They can be forgiven and move on with their lives in positive and exemplary fashion. But that course of consequence only comes when you have struggled to do the right thing over and over again and developed the muscle of responsibly behavior needed to act as an adult instead of a spoiled child.
And that is the difference between merely drifting along and becoming a vital, driving force for good.
Responsibility. It's not just for "other" people.
Roll Tide and let's all make some good choices out there.
When you choose poorly, and do so habitually, you open up a can of worms that just never seems to stop breeding. It's not that choosing poorly in and of itself is so horrible that you become unredeemable. It is that making certain choices reveal so much of your character and your decision making process that it becomes undeniable that you are untrustworthy and worse yet, that you are developing a streak within that sees nothing wrong with the victimization of other people for temporary personal gain.
That is dangerous.
The mind that thinks this way is a mind that has a serious problem with understanding the feelings, needs and desires of another human soul. It is the same kind of mind that assumes as long as no personal pain is experienced and that you are not "caught" that whatever act you committed isn't really a big deal and that is a tremendous problem that in short order becomes a societal one.
No organization, team or family can long tolerate the behavior of the few who do not feel that rules apply equally to all members. Their presence serves as the kind of disruptive factor that can destroy all that it comes in contact with and that wounds all whom it touches. The people who act as if the world is their oyster and everything they can touch or lay claim to should somehow be theirs with no thought of the labor of another are a burden to all.
The "infection", if you will, of this dangerous mindset can corrupt an entire group of people to the degree that they become drones on society and that is truly a heartbreak. Far better to sever out the few weak tendrils than to allow them to grow and breed and choke the life out of the tender plant that is personal accountability and character.
Many have criticized Nick Saban for not "acting immediately" to throw the 4 young men off the team for their robbery of a fellow UA student. He suspended them indefinitely pending investigation by the school and then, when the facts were all in place, they were dismissed - not just from the team, but from the campus, the school and the family that is the University of Alabama.
Saban did the right thing by allowing the university officials to conduct their investigation and to allow the honor code of the school to guide the way. A hasty rush to judgment wasn't warranted and serves no good purpose. The young men confessed so it was simply a matter of timing.
Our microwave society doesn't take too kindly to being told that decisions of this magnitude need to be more crockpot than microwave. By that, I mean that had the school acted presumptively and then discovered that some or all of the young men had been innocent in any degree, it would have created a trust problem between the students and the faculty that serves no one.
A crockpot mentality takes time to develop the idea into an act. Had these four young men been more deliberate in there thinking, perhaps they would have turned from their notion of destroying their own opportunity and that of abusing the trust of a UA family member in the process. I cannot guarantee they wouldn't have gone on ahead and acted rashly. But I can say that had at least some of them might have given their actions a second thought, the evening might well have turned out differently for all concerned.
Being responsible isn't "sexy". People view the "responsible one" as a wet blanket at a party, a real downer and someone who doesn't know how to live in the moment. But the truth is, our society does not function if everyone is a spontaneous "life of the party" functionary. We NEED the responsible persons to remind us all that while there are parties in life, life itself is NOT a party. There are times where we must deliberate carefully the cost of our actions on ourselves, our family and upon the larger world we must share with others.
Being responsible may well have saved the four students from their own stupidity and saved their victim the trauma caused by those whom he should have been able to trust always.
I do hope that this experience will serve to be an example to these four young men. They can be forgiven and move on with their lives in positive and exemplary fashion. But that course of consequence only comes when you have struggled to do the right thing over and over again and developed the muscle of responsibly behavior needed to act as an adult instead of a spoiled child.
And that is the difference between merely drifting along and becoming a vital, driving force for good.
Responsibility. It's not just for "other" people.
Roll Tide and let's all make some good choices out there.
January 28, 2013
You Know It's Gonna Be a Bad Day When...
It sounds horribly like a familiar joke.
Sadly, it wasn't funny. At least we weren't laughing.
My van's driver's side rear tire was flat a few days ago. Seeing no visible reason for the airless condition such as a slash, a cut, a nicked up spot, a nail or some other random sharp object protruding from the tire, I naively assumed it simply needed air.
Fifty cents later (and right now that is a considerable investment!), the tires were all inflated to regulation specs including the spare tire on the back of the van.
That was Friday.
Today, same tire... same soggy sides and airless rubber slump on the driveway.
Did I mention my spare tire is ALSO flat... flat... flat as a dead rat on the highway.
The queen is most decidedly NOT amused.
Hearing my whiny pitiful GEICO lizard cry about the flat tire, Rick got out the air compressor and filled me up enough to limp down to Wal-mart for tire repair.
Several HOURS and $20 bucks later, I am back home with all five of the tires in good shape. Now, lets all hope that pious hope that keeps us feeling secure in the knowledge that the tires will not go flat again!!
I can get behind the fact that tires go flat. What irks me about this entire little episode of shame is that the spare... the SPARE tire... was only good for decoration.
I'm sure my van really needs the decoration. It's beginning to not be good for much else but yard art.
I am, however, reasonably sure that my neighborhood is not sufficiently avant-guarde to appreciate the beauty and splendor brought on by one 1994 rusting, downtrodden, creakily old van, not even if I put a peeing boy fountain on it as a hood ornament.
Sad to say, we have been bypassed time and again for the riches of the Publisher's Clearinghouse and Reader's Digest prize money that they swear to high heaven you don't have to buy anything, give up your firstborn, or sell your soul to the devil to obtain. If that was the case, we should have won all of their money by now.
Fortunately, Beth decided to take pity on me and my plight and came down to Wal-mart to keep me company wandering up and down the aisles of the store. It kept me sane and possibly kept me awake since Jared determined that sleep last night was for OTHER people besides me.
So, I'm about to eat some soup and drink some vegetable juice and hope that there are no other unhappy surprises lurking around today.
God bless and remember that a spare tire only means you have a big, black, rubber donut in your trunk or mounted on your vehicle. It is in no way a guarantee, a warranty or a promise that it will be there to help you in your time of need.
By the way, does anyone know that a flat spare tire can laugh? They do... I am fairly certain of it because I heard my laughing at me today.
Sadly, it wasn't funny. At least we weren't laughing.
My van's driver's side rear tire was flat a few days ago. Seeing no visible reason for the airless condition such as a slash, a cut, a nicked up spot, a nail or some other random sharp object protruding from the tire, I naively assumed it simply needed air.
Fifty cents later (and right now that is a considerable investment!), the tires were all inflated to regulation specs including the spare tire on the back of the van.
That was Friday.
Today, same tire... same soggy sides and airless rubber slump on the driveway.
Did I mention my spare tire is ALSO flat... flat... flat as a dead rat on the highway.
The queen is most decidedly NOT amused.
Hearing my whiny pitiful GEICO lizard cry about the flat tire, Rick got out the air compressor and filled me up enough to limp down to Wal-mart for tire repair.
Several HOURS and $20 bucks later, I am back home with all five of the tires in good shape. Now, lets all hope that pious hope that keeps us feeling secure in the knowledge that the tires will not go flat again!!
I can get behind the fact that tires go flat. What irks me about this entire little episode of shame is that the spare... the SPARE tire... was only good for decoration.
I'm sure my van really needs the decoration. It's beginning to not be good for much else but yard art.
I am, however, reasonably sure that my neighborhood is not sufficiently avant-guarde to appreciate the beauty and splendor brought on by one 1994 rusting, downtrodden, creakily old van, not even if I put a peeing boy fountain on it as a hood ornament.
Sad to say, we have been bypassed time and again for the riches of the Publisher's Clearinghouse and Reader's Digest prize money that they swear to high heaven you don't have to buy anything, give up your firstborn, or sell your soul to the devil to obtain. If that was the case, we should have won all of their money by now.
Fortunately, Beth decided to take pity on me and my plight and came down to Wal-mart to keep me company wandering up and down the aisles of the store. It kept me sane and possibly kept me awake since Jared determined that sleep last night was for OTHER people besides me.
So, I'm about to eat some soup and drink some vegetable juice and hope that there are no other unhappy surprises lurking around today.
God bless and remember that a spare tire only means you have a big, black, rubber donut in your trunk or mounted on your vehicle. It is in no way a guarantee, a warranty or a promise that it will be there to help you in your time of need.
By the way, does anyone know that a flat spare tire can laugh? They do... I am fairly certain of it because I heard my laughing at me today.
January 24, 2013
Free Stuff
I am a big fan of free stuff.
Free event tickets, free t-shirts, free toothpaste, free deodorant, free free free.
I live under the premise that something you have received in the mail for free is a good thing. If you don't like whatever it is, the size is SO small you don't feel all that bad about tossing it. And if you discover something that came for free was actually worth buying, you haven't spent money to make that happy discovery.
There are some free things that I am not a fan of.
Free advice from people who are completely clueless. These are the benevolent souls who, for instance, have no disabled children, but who feel completely free to give advice on how to care for our disabled son's needs. Yeah, y'all feel free to show up at 5:15 a.m. and we will feel free to give you a day in the life... or twelve.
I am not a big fan of free attitude. You know the people. Everyone has encountered them, the people who exude waves of disapproval over your choices. It's like you suddenly became a permanent resident of "The People of Wal-mart" website and they are here to critique what got you listed as such. They are free to go butt a stump. (Momma used to say that - I suspect she would have liked to have been free to say something more harsh, but Momma was always a lady in all circumstances)
I am not a fan of free poop on my windshield from birds who obviously are laughing at my predicament when my temperamental van's wipers work whenever and however THEY choose. Well played, evil birds, well played.
Other free stuff would be great. Being declared the winner of the Reader's Digest sweepstakes and their free money would be exciting. I'm not holding my breath.
Have a free day. You have my permission.
Free event tickets, free t-shirts, free toothpaste, free deodorant, free free free.
I live under the premise that something you have received in the mail for free is a good thing. If you don't like whatever it is, the size is SO small you don't feel all that bad about tossing it. And if you discover something that came for free was actually worth buying, you haven't spent money to make that happy discovery.
There are some free things that I am not a fan of.
Free advice from people who are completely clueless. These are the benevolent souls who, for instance, have no disabled children, but who feel completely free to give advice on how to care for our disabled son's needs. Yeah, y'all feel free to show up at 5:15 a.m. and we will feel free to give you a day in the life... or twelve.
I am not a big fan of free attitude. You know the people. Everyone has encountered them, the people who exude waves of disapproval over your choices. It's like you suddenly became a permanent resident of "The People of Wal-mart" website and they are here to critique what got you listed as such. They are free to go butt a stump. (Momma used to say that - I suspect she would have liked to have been free to say something more harsh, but Momma was always a lady in all circumstances)
I am not a fan of free poop on my windshield from birds who obviously are laughing at my predicament when my temperamental van's wipers work whenever and however THEY choose. Well played, evil birds, well played.
Other free stuff would be great. Being declared the winner of the Reader's Digest sweepstakes and their free money would be exciting. I'm not holding my breath.
Have a free day. You have my permission.
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