March 18, 2012

Bowing before the porcelain god

Really?

Can my life suck any more right now??

Food poisoning is not for wimps.

I have been so sick, I swear I have thrown up food I ate when I was 5.

During the break between runs to the bathroom, I tried to sleep. Hypothermia and chills alternated with fever and sweating. At one point, I considered simply sleeping in the bathroom on the floor, but the fact that the little lights in the bathroom beneath the cabinetry stay runway bright would have prevented any sleep from occurring at all.

Wisely, I opted to skip church as the sight of my gagging and barfing while directing the hymns might have been a bit off-putting to the congregation. Kari filled in for me to whip the music up into a proper tempo and get the singing moving along.

Just a bit before Rick and Jared left to pick up Daddy for church, I thought a shower might make me feel better. Wrong!! Oh, so very wrong. How stupid can I get? I threw up on my feet. DANG IT!!! And EEEEEEWWWWWW GROSS! Since I was already wet, I cleaned up whatever needed cleaning, dried, donned clean PJ"s and lay on the couch to die. At this point, death might just have been preferable. When your entire body has a cramp in it from barfing, it's time to call it a day... possibly a day and a half.

I remember saying goodbye to Rick and Jared, then lying down. I read a little bit then fell asleep. The next thing I remember was waking up in a start when Beth knocked at the door, which was locked. I tried to get up and wound up massaging a cramp out of my leg because I more than likely threw up every speck of electrolytes that my body once held.

Gatorade! Where are you when I need you?

I am still kind of queasy even all these hours later, but at least I have been able to keep a little food down. I hope this sensation passes from me. It's just not fun to be this sick.

I'm going to bed. I hope for all night long.

Pray for me... the porcelain god has seen enough of my "worship" for a while... and I sure don't wish this food poisoning on anyone else. I don't think I hate any other living creature that much.