July 20, 2013

Time passes

It's now July 20th, our ward pioneer day barbecue and softball game is in the books and I am still grappling with the attempt to balance the need for exercise with the pain I am still "enjoying".

Since I started walking again, I have done 28.95 miles. And yes, I am tracking it.

That is nothing to those lithe figures running up and down my street each day. It is mere pittance to those gazelle like creatures who bound about from place to place running marathons, half marathons and triathlons for fun and sometimes profit and glory.

But to me, it represents a great deal. It means I am still moving. I am still trying. I am still HERE.

Though I am not able to pull those miles in like ribbon on a spool, I am trying to at least begin tugging on that ribbon of highway that Woody Guthrie sang about so long ago. Is it better to start reeling it in fast and perhaps give up in the attempt, or to just keep trying?

I hope the second is the answer because I plan to keep trying.

Every day, I am trying to balance pain and activity. One without the other doesn't seem possible right now. I hope that will change over time.

For now, I am basking in the glory of possibility. Just a few months ago, the very idea of even trying to stand up seemed as remote as the moon. Now, I am able to walk over a mile and a half without stopping.

So I blog the progress and the process.

Hope. It's all I hang on to some days. But I am thankful for that tenuous grasp on the possible.