It happens that I have a very well developed sense of humor.
Sometimes that gets me into all manner of difficulty as that funny bone gets tickled at inappropriate times and occasionally for inappropriate reasons.
Because I begin my day at the computer most days, I like to check in on the news and happenings of the world, read a few items posted on Facebook and catch up on Scrabble online. There are days those news and happenings absolutely crack me up.
As an example, I reference a news article from a while ago that I found while perusing through the small town newspaper from a place I've never even been before. I do that sometimes when I am sick of the newscasts in our area. As a disclaimer, I am NOT advocating vandalism in any form.
However, having said that I am also not advocating drinking milk while you read this article. I managed to snort milk from my nose because I was laughing so hard at the visual imagery in my head and it could have been a dangerous choking incident (or at least ruined my computer keyboard).
This comes from the newspaper that serves the delightful hamlet of Beatrice, Nebraska:
"Toilet seats are meant for restrooms. Not public park restroom
ceilings. But that's not the case at Hannibal Park in Beatrice. There,
vandals took sparklers, made a bomb, then practically took out the men
and women restrooms.'They take what traditionally would be just a
sparkler, they tape them together and because of the confinement of them
being taped together, it causes a really really big explosion,'
Beatrice Police Chief Bruce Lang said. And what a big explosion it was. Debris can be
seen outside the bathroom stalls. Near the roof, the air conditioning
hangs loosely by its hinges. Inside the women's restroom, the toilet was
blown to pieces. Inside the men's restroom, wet tissue and porcelain
pieces were strewn everywhere".
INCOMING!! Flying john pieces at 12 o'clock!!!
I will cop to the fact that I have had more than a few run-ins with homemade explosives. Heck, I may OR MAY NOT have been responsible for an outhouse that sort of exploded. The jury is still out on that one... but the description of the incident with the accompanying picture of the toilet seat jammed through the roof of the outhouse is just funny to me. Milk snorting through the nose funny.
Please do not take this as an invitation to go blow up a toilet just so you can watch me snorting milk from my nostrils. And don't go cow tipping either. It doesn't work and you get poop all over your shoes. Which is likely what the people in that restroom may have discovered after the untimely demise of their facilities.
Have a nice day and remember that just because you CAN explode a john doesn't mean you SHOULD explode a john.
