At the checkup on Friday, Doc told me to start walking with gradual weight bearing on the left leg until I am able to go without walker, cane or wheelchair.
He is giving me the six weeks until my next appointment to be free of aids.
I can do this.
I'm off all the narcotic medication and pretty well managed with over the counter pain medicine as needed.
Walking again has made me a bit dizzy since the body isn't use to sharing the weight around and it makes things feel kind of odd. The swelling continues to diminish and the nerve function is getting back to normal.
Where before my left leg and hip and pelvis were just bloated and swollen beyond reason, I am now almost equalized on the measurements between the leg sizes. The numbed area that used to extend from hip to toes is now localized to an area on my left thigh about the size of my hand and to a couple of toes - but that is also getting better.
Meanwhile, I am trying to walk as much as I can within reason as I regain balance and strength. If I do too much too quick, I'll create a setback that is completely avoidable by just being careful about how much I push.
I'm still doing the daily PT plus the walking. I'm hopeful that soon I can get into the pool where I can get some warm water PT to help the muscles strengthen with the neutral buoyancy of the therapy pool.
All in due time.
A phrase that both is hard to swallow and a good reminder that I am not in charge.
Due time... I'm an impatient sort, but thankful that God has granted me some more time on this earth to become less rushed, less "me, me, me" and more "what Thou would have me do".
One step at a time...
I never appreciated that phrase more than now.
God bless.
May 21, 2013
May 12, 2013
Happy Mother's Day
Today is the day set aside to honor the women who are our Mothers, those women who stand in the stead of our mothers and those women who are just motherly in their nature who care for us all.
I miss my Momma every single day since she has passed. But I am so thankful for her influence and her care in my life. She taught me all about life and had a gentle way of making things seem less intense and more manageable even when it was hard for me to understand.
Mother's Day is a day to also remember the wonderful blessing of having a good Momma. Not just someone who brought a baby into the world, but the soul who loved me, held me tight, wiped my tears, cheered my victories, supported me as I learned new things and helped me feel excited about all that was a possibility.
She baked the nicest loaves of bread. I didn't inherit that skill. She also made really good cake. The good kind, not from a box.
She made my clothing and pajamas. I remember her sewing into the late hours to make me clothing that was nice and made me feel loved.
I remember her cool hands on my face and forehead when I was ill, her warm hands bandaging my cuts and boo boos and the kindness in her hands as she wiped away my tears.
Momma would read to me and tell me stories and sing me songs while she played the piano. It was such a nice and comfortable feeling to know that she was there.
Now, I take comfort in the fact that she is in heaven. There would be no other place she could go. She has received a reward that is most assuredly deserved. I just hope they have a nice piano there where she can play.
I am thankful for my goodly and Godly Mother. It is the best thing to ponder upon on a Mother's Day that I can honestly say that my Mother was and is a good woman.
I miss my Momma every single day since she has passed. But I am so thankful for her influence and her care in my life. She taught me all about life and had a gentle way of making things seem less intense and more manageable even when it was hard for me to understand.
Mother's Day is a day to also remember the wonderful blessing of having a good Momma. Not just someone who brought a baby into the world, but the soul who loved me, held me tight, wiped my tears, cheered my victories, supported me as I learned new things and helped me feel excited about all that was a possibility.
She baked the nicest loaves of bread. I didn't inherit that skill. She also made really good cake. The good kind, not from a box.
She made my clothing and pajamas. I remember her sewing into the late hours to make me clothing that was nice and made me feel loved.
I remember her cool hands on my face and forehead when I was ill, her warm hands bandaging my cuts and boo boos and the kindness in her hands as she wiped away my tears.
Momma would read to me and tell me stories and sing me songs while she played the piano. It was such a nice and comfortable feeling to know that she was there.
Now, I take comfort in the fact that she is in heaven. There would be no other place she could go. She has received a reward that is most assuredly deserved. I just hope they have a nice piano there where she can play.
I am thankful for my goodly and Godly Mother. It is the best thing to ponder upon on a Mother's Day that I can honestly say that my Mother was and is a good woman.
May 9, 2013
Little bit at a time
Patience is not my strong suit.
Learning that I have to continue to progress at the rate that my healing under God's direction is progressing is a hard lesson. I want to be well now and go about life. But I am realizing that my plans are not God's plans and that sometimes the idea of rushing things has a pretty hairy price to pay.
When I do too much, I definitely feel it and it comes in waves of pain.
And that makes things harder to deal with in the long run.
The good news is I've watched some good, old programs and I'm reading some good books and magazines.
The bad news is that I am worn out and tired of the pain.
But I'm still here, so I'm trying to focus on the blessing of being alive when it well could have worked out another way.
I am truly thankful that I'm not on the other side of the long dirt nap.
I'm thankful to have more time to become what God intends despite my sinful nature.
And most of all, I am thankful to have more time with my family and friends even if all I can do is tell them that I love them. That is the best thing they could hear from me.
God bless!
Learning that I have to continue to progress at the rate that my healing under God's direction is progressing is a hard lesson. I want to be well now and go about life. But I am realizing that my plans are not God's plans and that sometimes the idea of rushing things has a pretty hairy price to pay.
When I do too much, I definitely feel it and it comes in waves of pain.
And that makes things harder to deal with in the long run.
The good news is I've watched some good, old programs and I'm reading some good books and magazines.
The bad news is that I am worn out and tired of the pain.
But I'm still here, so I'm trying to focus on the blessing of being alive when it well could have worked out another way.
I am truly thankful that I'm not on the other side of the long dirt nap.
I'm thankful to have more time to become what God intends despite my sinful nature.
And most of all, I am thankful to have more time with my family and friends even if all I can do is tell them that I love them. That is the best thing they could hear from me.
God bless!
April 28, 2013
Ain't No Sunshine...
The rainy weather over the last couple of days has just about killed me.
So many little drips and drops of water each bring a little dribbly bit of pain with them to my bruised and broken body. They don't mean to be cruel, they just are.
For some people, rain is a good thing. Watering the lawn, the flowers, the plants and filling up the lakes and reservoirs so we can all enjoy a good drink. Most of the time, I'm happy for the rain. Lately, however, it seems we are getting a lot of rain and it truly brings pain.
I stayed in from church today. I had intended to try to go and at least attend sacrament meeting. But my body wasn't cooperating and neither was the weather. It's pretty bad when you have to have a nap in bed just to make it through the morning.
Patience.
That word keeps being repeated and it most certainly means I need to develop some patience. It isn't first nature or even second nature for me. The concept of waiting for all of the healing and regrowth of bone shouldn't be new information for me, but it seems like it is harder the older I get.
I'm watching our DVD set of the Andy Griffith show because it helps me cope. Plus it is gentle. This particular foray into the agony of a broken body has made me much less tolerant of programs that are harsh and violent in any way.
Without the blessing of gentle alternatives this might be a harder recovery. I am thankful for church movies and other good programs that help me feel the kinder side of life.
While there ain't no sunshine right now, I can bring in a bit of sunshine emotionally with some good programs that make me feel happy and help me feel relaxed.
So many little drips and drops of water each bring a little dribbly bit of pain with them to my bruised and broken body. They don't mean to be cruel, they just are.
For some people, rain is a good thing. Watering the lawn, the flowers, the plants and filling up the lakes and reservoirs so we can all enjoy a good drink. Most of the time, I'm happy for the rain. Lately, however, it seems we are getting a lot of rain and it truly brings pain.
I stayed in from church today. I had intended to try to go and at least attend sacrament meeting. But my body wasn't cooperating and neither was the weather. It's pretty bad when you have to have a nap in bed just to make it through the morning.
Patience.
That word keeps being repeated and it most certainly means I need to develop some patience. It isn't first nature or even second nature for me. The concept of waiting for all of the healing and regrowth of bone shouldn't be new information for me, but it seems like it is harder the older I get.
I'm watching our DVD set of the Andy Griffith show because it helps me cope. Plus it is gentle. This particular foray into the agony of a broken body has made me much less tolerant of programs that are harsh and violent in any way.
Without the blessing of gentle alternatives this might be a harder recovery. I am thankful for church movies and other good programs that help me feel the kinder side of life.
While there ain't no sunshine right now, I can bring in a bit of sunshine emotionally with some good programs that make me feel happy and help me feel relaxed.
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