Homemaking, purses and cake

So, I go tonight and discover two very important things at the meeting tonight.

Number one, my purse contains WAY TOO MUCH JUNK and number two, cake is more of a weakness that I would like to admit.

We had a fun night tonight but I sometimes go home feeling disconnected from the reality that the other women face on a daily basis. Has it really become so easy to be cocooned in MY world that I have forgotten that there are other people and other needs?

I used to be more involved but I have come to realize that part of my so called involvement was propping up people who didn't really want to participate at all.

Talk about junk in your purse!

Where do we draw the line between helping someone along and nurturing them through a hard time and simply dragging them around like dead weight in our purse because we don't want to hurt their feelings when it's time to say goodbye? Is is possible that some of that is more than an act of simple self preservation and is instead the kindest thing we can do for someone else to cut them loose? I read somewhere "Sometimes the best helping hand we can give is a firm push."

I truly believe that, otherwise I'd probably still be living at home and letting my parents take care of me forever.

Let's just postulate a thought here: could it be possible that when we carry people along in a sympathetic vein we are simply preventing the growth that SHOULD happen because we are worried about hurting them and ironically enough, they ARE hurt by the fact that they are crippled by our 'care'.

It's a hard decision to make.

We can't just stand by and hope for the best without being active participants and players in our own lives! It just doesn't work that way. For better or worse, we have to make choices and skin our knees and do unpleasant stuff to get to all of the goodies that are truly wonderful.

Sort of a right of passage gig.

But back to the purses. If I carry all of someone elses collected junk for them in MY purse, how can I find MY stuff when I need it? The same is true of our lives. If we carry around someone else's life for them, we have little strength left for our own.

I don't believe in 'tough love'. But I do believe that sometimes if you truly love someone, you have to tell them the truth and say, "I have carried you as far along the path as I am willing to do. Now, you either have to walk on your own, or wait for someone else to pick you up."

I know it works because a woman whom I used to visit teach and give rides to all over creation is now coming to church. I have to believe part of it is because I finally told the people who 'assigned me' to take care of her that I was DONE.

Now, they come because they want to.

They are finally carrying their OWN purse.

Maybe that is the reason that we should carry a purse. They are all different because they reflect who we are, but they hold our collective junk for whenever we need it. They need to be large enough to serve, but small enough to prevent voluntary slavery to someone who won't carry their own load.

Just ramblings of an almighty disturbed mind . . .