December 24, 2008

NORAD Tracks Santa

H. D. Bagley was the weatherman on WHNT channel 19 when I was a kid. He was a Brylcreme man who wore conservative suits with dark ties and announced the weather in no-nonsense terms.

No silly contests to name the mapboard, no artwork from children in the Dogpatch Trailer Park.

Nope, H. D. was all weather.

But something quite amazing happened every Christmas season. H. D. Bagley prepared the Santa Forecast complete with state of the art 1968 graphics and charts to show the progress of Santa Claus.

He even offered a stern, but friendly reminder that it was time for the kids to go to bed so Santa could deliver our presents and continue on his journey to the good girls and boys of the world.

Now, taking up the torch for the internet generation, Google Earth offers 3D Santa tracking. I've had mine on all day.

Santa just finished passing out presents in Rome, Italy, and is now in Vienna, Austria.

Soon, he will be bringing presents to my son in Germany in his zig-zag flight through the skies to bring Christmas cheer to people near and far.

According to the current tracking, Santa has just come to the Neuschwanstein Castle in Germany. He will be at the apartment my son is sleeping in within mere seconds! Ho! Ho! Ho! Merry Christmas to good little missionaries far from home!

Santa has delivered gifts to all of Germany now and is flying over Switzerland to bring happiness to people in the neutral nation of private security bank vaults and numbered Swiss accounts. I'm sure Santa has a vault all to himself in Geneva.

Santa, enjoy the flight with the reindeer tonight! We'll leave some goodies for you and the deer and a greeting to Mrs. Claus and the elves at home. We know tonight is just the focal point for the behind the scenes work that goes on year round without much notice by the rest of the world.

Ho! Ho! Ho! Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night.

And as a strange post script to this all...

here are my answers to a 'getting to know you survey':

1. Who was your FIRST prom date? Are we speaking of the troll who DITCHED ME and then bragged about it?

2. Do you still talk to your FIRST love? Yep, he's the local appliance repair man.

3. What was your FIRST alcoholic drink? Does the alcohol on a thermometer count?

4. What was your FIRST job? Warehouse worker.

5. What was your FIRST car? Toyota hatchback.

6. Who was the FIRST person to text you today? Nobody texts me unless it's a mistake.

7. Who is the FIRST person you thought of this morning? Rick, his alarm went off and I asked if it was time to get up yet. :snicker:

8. Who was your FIRST grade teacher? Mrs. Sneed Christopher.

9. Where did you go on your FIRST ride on an airplane? Dallas

10. Who was your FIRST best friend and are you still friends with them? My sister and yes, we talk every day.

11. What was your FIRST sport played? Baseball

12. Where was your FIRST sleep over? Aunt Jewel's

13. Who was the FIRST person you talked to today? Rick

14. Whose wedding were you in the FIRST time? My own :snicker: and my sister Kari's and I was very pregnant for Kari's wedding.

15. What was the FIRST thing you did this morning? Got the dog off of my feet.

16. What was the FIRST concert you ever went to? The Nutcracker Ballet by the Nashville Symphony

17. FIRST tattoo or piercing? Ears when I was eighteen years old.

18. FIRST foreign country you went to? Canada

19. What was your FIRST run in with the law? Now, is that a polite question to ask during he Christmas season????

20. When was your FIRST detention? 5th grade.

21. What was the FIRST state you lived in? Confusion.... seriously, Alabama.

22. Who was the FIRST person to break your heart? Sam

23. Who was your FIRST roommate? My sister

24. Where did you go on your FIRST limo ride? Never been in a limo.

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