Songs for baby time

♫♪♫ I see the moon and the moon sees me
♫♪♫ Over the mountains over the seas
♫♪♫ Please let the light that shines on me
♫♪♫ Shine on the one I love.

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

♪♫♪ See the pretty orange moon
♪♫♪ Way up like a toy balloon
♪♫♪ Someone took it out to play
♪♫♪ And it flew away

When I was just a little girl, Daddy would sing these songs to me to help me sleep. The first is a variant on an old Irish ditty that was sung to him. No telling how old it is.

After my own little ones came along, the song was shared with them and hopefully somewhere in the fine particles of thought from their little boy-hood remembrances that song is there.

Any time now, Thomas will become a Daddy. And I hope he will share with his little children these songs. They are not fancy or extremely amazing, but hearing them fills my heart with a tender time of little fingers wrapped around one of mine as I would sing to them while I rocked them in the dim light of the night light's glow in the wee hours.

I find myself wishing I'd been a better Mother. That I could go back and take away every single time I was not patient enough, not tender enough and not good enough for those sweet little angels whom God has entrusted me with in this mortal sojourn.

I wish I could go back and see with the 20/20 vision that only retrospect can bring to help us see that the rocks in the pockets in the laundry ARE the treasure of a small boy and not a nuisance. To see that the tiny curls of sweaty hair around the smudged but cherubic face of a toddler worn out by play are a wreath of immortality that will fade for a time as life presses too closely.

I'd like to slow the clock down and not feel like every single thing had to be perfect to be good. To be the kind of mother that my boys should have had instead of the one they did have. The mother who was willing to be molded by the wisdom of their understanding instead of pushing so much of my own supposed brilliance onto their gentle spirits.

I think of one song that Daddy would sometimes sing that was kind of religious and melancholy. He would sing "If You Could Hie To Kolob" and it made me think then of a place that was just out of reach. Now I think of it and know that there is so much more to God than I can comprehend.

When Thomas holds his little son for the very first time, I hope that he is able to see that piece of heaven that has come to earth to be in his home. That the little boy he holds is a part of a future that goes beyond the things we can see with mortal eyes. That he and Tianna have been part of God's continued plan for all the seed of Abraham.

Please, let the Light of Christ that shines on me shine on the ones I love.