The Secret Gambler In Us All

What compels me to think that Publishers Clearinghouse would, under any circumstances, bring me a giant check for ANY amount of money?

Much less the bazillion dollar prize granted only to people who have spent their entire life savings a thousand times over on discounted magazine subscriptions?

But deep within my DNA is a gene (or maybe just the snippet of a gene which resembles a scratch off card from the gas station on 65) which believes with every fiber of it's code that I can win and win big.

Reality sets in when the rest of the double helix gives this impertinent snippet a swirly in the soup of genetic material and the urge to pass over a weeks' wages for the chance at a 'really big win' passes in the cold shower of truth.

The only people who win are the printers for the scratch off cards and the bookies who take one look at me and see the remaining parts of my DNA for what I truly am. A loser.

I am not particularly sad about that. In fact, that revelation simply comforts me in an odd sort of way.

Most of our society is made up of losers. We make the people who win seem somehow better and more special because we wish it was us. The sad truth is that the winners often become losers when the vast amounts of money change them and change their lives. Often those changes are not for the better.

Relatives no one knows show up for their piece of the pie and bills that weren't on the radar are now suddenly pressing.

People who haven't the financial smarts to get help with their newfound money go through it like there is no tomorrow until tomorrow comes and the piper shows up to be paid.

Though I have made great mental plans as to what I would do with my millions, and believe that I would make good choices, the fact is that I will never get the chance to find out and that's just fine by me. I'd rather count my wealth in people not pennies and in the currency of friendship not five spots.

What I would like is a scratch off card that eliminates housework. That might be worth a couple of bucks, come to think of it.