Something's different....

So, Kari and I went to do a little shopping and spend some time hanging out.

The stores were nice, the prices EXCELLENT, the opportunity to get out together - fabulous.

On the way home, we were minding our business staying in our lane despite the construction ripping up one  half of the west bound part of US 72 when suddenly our senses were viciously assaulted with what can only be described as a mass skunk bomb that lasted for miles.

HOLY MOSES WHAT IS THAT STENCH!!

My eyes were watering and Kari had dragged up the neck of  her shirt to cover her face so she could attempt to filter the air she was breathing.

It lasted for MILES AND MILES!! This must have been the jumping off spot for the skunk version of the hereafter because there was nothing but the thick green mist, metaphorically speaking, passing through the cracks, crevices and pores of the PT Cruiser.

There was NO escaping the stench!! I was willing to shove my own socks up my nose just to save myself. Heck, I was willing to shove the socks of someone else up my nose!! OH MY GOODNESS!! THIS IS AWFUL!!  Turning the A/C off didn't help. The pungent and nostril burning aroma just kept coming and coming and coming.

I swear the glass was beginning to melt! Holy cow, what a stink!!

Because I have a warped mind, I wondered aloud if we had a skunk somehow attached to the car or if perchance someone had pulled a nasty prank and shoved one under the hood while we'd been in the store. What a funny prank to play on two ladies. Ha ha NOT.

Then the tendrils of memory strolled back to a coffee commercial where they played a switcheroo to see what would happen. I alter it to suit my twisted sense of humor below.

"Today, the unsuspecting Kari and Shelley are about to be given a real change... let's see if they notice... The normal air filter they use to breath pure air in the PT Cruiser has been replaced... replaced with a roadkill skunk freshly gathered from the highway. Will they be able to tell the difference?"

"Mmm. Smell that country fresh aroma."

GAG! SPIT! CHOKE!

Yeah, we noticed alright. I think I'll remember that smell forever. No one - NO ONE - will ever say they prefer the switch between oxygen and skunk spray. And no one will EVER be fooled into thinking that is a pleasant change of pace.

The best part of waking up is NOT a skunk. Come to think of it, that fetid, malodorous "perfume" might be what causes the living dead. Michael Jackson's "Thriller" may  have been about skunks instead of zombies. Either way, the horrified look is the same.

Air... oxygen... help... please....