Death by Fragrance

I'll begin by saying I'm not one to bathe in fragrance.

It just seems tacky and, well, wasteful.

Not subscribing to the the theory that if a little bit is good, a lot is better saves me a bundle on cologne, body spray and perfume. Plus, I don't wear it that often anyway.

Sadly, today one little oops with the spray button has plunged me into misery.

A spritz of scent is more than enough for this country gal. I kinda like my hubby to come in close for his whiff of beauty and splendor from the fragrance aisle.

However, I believe the neighbors could smell the beauty and splendor today. GAG!

Fortunately for all concerned, I own washcloths and soap and I'm not afraid to deploy them for emergency use.

Are you aware that a pleasant scent in the over the top measure proves to be an acrid, eye watering, nose clogging experience not meant for the faint of heart?

I have no desire to offend others, but I gotta tell you, offending yourself with your scent, even those aromas and scents meant to be pleasant, isn't pleasant or desirable at all.

Makes me rethink my entire position on the issue of applying cologne at all.

Can we still be friends with the people around us if we choose to be 'cucumber neutral'? Will they still respect me if they discover that I'm using a homemade all natural body bar instead of some over the counter floor washing solution with an added fragrance to seem like it's beautiful?

I'll admit I buy the above named potions from time to time. Sometimes I want to actually 'smell perty' instead of like the winner of the truck stop wrestling match.

But too much of a good thing can kill you.

When you are not able to breathe and you begin sneezing, your eyes are watering violently and you can feel your nasal passages slam shut from the offending olfactory assault, it's time to rethink the concept of 'dressing up'.

No wonder I prefer jeans and a t-shirt with a nice deodorant swiped up under each arm. Most days, it's enough when added to a nice warm bath.

Time to trundle off to church. I hope I don't smother anyone near me because I like to have smothered myself.

I just wonder what they'd put on my tombstone?

"Pertied herself to death." 

It is a cautionary tale indeed.